This is kinda a pain to read. I know, I re-read it before publishing. Well blame it on Tim Ford (blog | twitter) and this challenge. Tim asked, what is a transaction? How do you explain it in a non-technical way? He said “non-technical”…he didn’t say “non-cheesy”. It ain’t easy being cheesy so humor me.
Oh that First Kiss
Yes, that darned first kiss. His name was Ricky, the jerkmy first love. I knew it was eventually going to happen. I daydreamed about it, thought a lot about how to do it, asked my friends about it, and pretty much geeked (researched) my way to it. With all the thinking and feeling I did prior to “the event”, the whole kissing thing already seemed and felt so real. But experiences like this cannot be “just” imagined…it’s atomic…all or nothing. It either happens or it doesnt.
When he asked me to close my eyes, I thought, OMG, am I really going to do this? And the moment I did, I had that momentous FIRST kiss with that jerk my first love.
Everything else faded. Even the voice inside my head (not mine but my mom’s) stopped talking. It was actually happening. Just the two of us. We both reveled in the isolation.
And then it was over. That kiss changed me. I was in a consistent heaven state for a long time. It didn’t matter where I really was…in school, at home–I was in heaven.
Years have passed. Boyfriends have come and gone. There’ve been second, third, fourth and more kisses. But still, nothing beats that first kiss. There’s something about FIRSTs that just stays with us no matter what. Some durability that’s unique to all our FIRSTs.
Okay, enough. I’m stopping.
Yeah, that was kinda a pain to read huh? Come on, humor me. Aren’t you tired too of all those debit-credit bank examples to illustrate transactions??
So, how is this dorky kissing event even remotely related to what a transaction is?
Transactions are atomic.
It’s all or nothing. It either commits or aborts. Just like that kiss. It doesn’t matter if I practiced with a pillow a thousand times (yeah, looking back, that was disgusting). Until the kiss actually happened, it really actually didn’t happen. The kissing plans could be rolled back; the actual kiss? No way.
Transactions are isolated.
There could be a million other events going on while that kiss was happening. There could have been a guy wishing he was in Ricky’s place (oh-ho!) but nothing else could mess with that transaction…nobody else could take away that first. That transaction owned me!
Transactions are consistent.
That kiss left me in heaven–and if that’s not a logical state to be in–I don’t know what is. A kiss that special wouldn’t have allowed me to be in an illogical state. Happy, yes. Illogical, no.
Transactions are durable.
Even an earthquake couldn’t have stopped that kiss the moment it happened. In the past years, I’ve experienced a lot…but hey, the first kiss will always be the first kiss. I can’t destroy it nor recreate it. I can’t pretend that it didn’t happen because (thank God) it really did.
Conclusion
No conclusion. I’m already feeling so bad I wrote this. It’s (r)ICKY and cheesy…but, hey, it’s non-technical! And maybe, just maybe, I made it all up…:D
Ricky, please dont get ahead of yourself. I was really just forcing an analogy. And no, it wasn’t THAT good.
